


Dress

by KyloTrashForever



Series: Oneshots [6]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Carves His Name Into Her Bed Post, Birthday Smut, Childhood Friends, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Fluffy Ending, Friends to Lovers, Jealous Ben, Loss of Virginity, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Rey Punched A Boy For Ben, Secret Crush, She Doesn’t Want Him Like A Best Friend, Songfic, Time Skips, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, dress porn, jealous Rey, starts with smut, virgin reylo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2018-11-26
Packaged: 2019-08-29 17:42:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16748662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KyloTrashForever/pseuds/KyloTrashForever
Summary: He couldn’t believe this was actually happening. How many nights had he dreamt of this exact moment? Holding her like this, touching her like this… he’d thought of little else since for far too long.“We wasted so much time,” Rey sighed, her hands sneaking under the gapped fabric down his front and ghosting over his chest. Her touch was everything he’d been dreaming about and more. He couldn’t hold back the groan that escaped him, gripping at the silk of that damned dress that had tormented him all night.“I know,” he lamented. “I know. Not anymore. I’m yours, Rey. I’ve been yours since the day you said you liked my ears.”In which childhood friends take way too much time realizing how much they love each other— and it all comes down to a dress.





	Dress

**Author's Note:**

> This one got away from me, and is 100% based on this song that I’m hopelessly obsessed with.  
> [Dress](https://youtu.be/JjdjOZvvucw)

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

“ _Rey_ ,” Ben groaned, running his hands over the tight silk that clung to Rey’s hips. “Are you— are you sure you about this?”

She halted her task of undoing the buttons on his dress shirt, suddenly unsure. “Ben… you have no idea how long I’ve wanted this.”

“You just… you never said anything,” he breathed.

“Neither did you,” she reminded. “Does that mean you don’t want this?”

His fingers curled around her waist, pulling her closer and ducking to let his lips brush against hers. They lingered for a moment, the warmth of his kiss making her dizzy. _“_ There’s nothing in the world I’ve ever wanted more.”

She smiled, heat blooming in her chest. She’d dreamt of this moment for years, actual _years._ She’d almost given up hope that this would ever happen for them. Ben was her best friend. He’d been the only constant in her life since she was nine years old. She couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment that everything changed for her, but for so long she’d wanted _more._ She didn’t want to be his friend, she wanted to be his _everything._ Now it seemed she might finally get her chance.

She owed it all to a dress.

* * *

_June 18th, 2007_

Rey loved the park. When she was there she didn’t think about the foster home, or the bad eggs, or the shared bathroom, or any of the other less than satisfactory pieces of her nine year old life… all she cared about in those moments was the sun on her face and the wind in her hair. Life was okay there. Life was _good._

She sat perched beneath an old oak that towered upwards near the stream, listening to the soft rolling of the water and scribbling in her notebook. There were always things running through her head, lines and colors just begging for her to put them to paper. So she scribbled. She scribbled until the picture was clear.

Shouting interrupted her reverie, some commotion going on across the grass that drew her attention. She leaned up, glancing across the field and seeing a crowd of older kids circled around a boy who looked about her age who was trying to get past. He didn’t look happy, and the other boys didn’t seem to want to let him go easily. She watched for a moment, telling herself not to get involved.

Then they pushed him.

She felt herself get angry, enraged that they would gang up on him like that. She knew he was a stranger, and that she owed him nothing, but her feet were already moving, her steps sure. She heard their taunts as she neared; they were making fun of his ears for some reason. She couldn’t see them, as his hands were clasped tightly over them.

“Hey _Dumbo,_ what’s wrong?” the largest of them goaded. “If you want to leave why don’t you just fly away?”

Rey almost groaned. What a dumb joke. “ _Hey,”_ she shouted, causing their group to turn. “Leave him alone.”

She saw the boy glance over at her with wide, brown eyes, his too large mouth pressed into a tight line and his hands still clutching at his ears as if to hide them. His hair was buzzed close to his head as if recently shaved but she could tell it had once been very dark in color.

He looked miserable.

The large boy that Rey determined was the leader turned to sneer, taking a menacing step towards her and crossing his arms. “What are you going to do about it? You’re just a dumb girl.”

“Bet I could still whoop you,” she threatened.

She could. She could hold her own. She’d dealt with bigger jerks than him. He unfolded his arms to clench his fist, leaning closer to poke a finger into her shoulder. “Why don’t you just run home and play with your dolls or something? Leave _Dumbo_ to us.”

She glanced down at his fat finger poking at her shoulder, frowning. “Don’t touch me.”

He smirked. “What are you going to do about it?”

She met the gaze of the boy, giving her an almost imperceptible shake of his head as if asking her to leave it alone. She didn’t think she’d ever seen anyone look so sad.

“That’s what I thought,” the bully laughed. “Now go on and play with your—”

He grunted when her fist connected with his nose, doubling over and and clutching at his face even as blood gushed from his nostrils. She immediately groaned in pain, her knuckles screaming in protest.

“You little _bitch_ ,” the boy spit out, moving towards her with menacing intent.

A strong hand clutched at the boy’s arm, halting his movement and pulling him aside. “Is there a problem here?”

Rey sighed in relief at the sight of the policeman, moving towards the boy with the alleged big ears as the group of older kids backed away. Their leader gave Rey one last begrudged look before shrugging out of the policeman’s hold.

“No officer,” he grumbled. “No problem.”

“Good,” the officer confirmed. “Best run along then.”

The boys took off in a hurry, the policeman giving her a wink. “Nice right hook,” he praised, “but next time maybe settle things a little more amicably.”

“Yes, sir,” she grinned.

He left them to it, striding off across the park and Rey turned to the boy her knuckles were currently screaming at her over. “Are you okay?”

Finally his hands came away from his ears, and she couldn’t help but grin. They actually were kind of big, and his buzzcut didn’t do anything to help matters.

“I’m okay,” he offered shyly. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know all about bullies. They’re usually as dumb as they are mean. Besides, they shouldn’t have been picking on you like that,” she assured.

He frowned. “My ears are pretty big though.”

She beamed back at him. “I don’t know, I kind of like them.”

He grinned toothily, the action lighting up his whole face. “Thanks.”

“Although,” she teased, “it might help you out to wear your hair a little longer.”

He huffed out a frustrated breath. ”I didn’t want to cut it this short. My Dad is sending me to this stupid ROTC camp next week. He’s a _pilot_ . Says it will be _good_ for me.”

“Aw,” she laughed. “It’ll grow back. Maybe it’ll be fun?”

He gestured to the bright blonde streak near her cheek, his eyebrows raised. “I like your hair though.”

She picked up the bleached streak that had seemed like such a good idea at the time, laughing. “We watched _X-Men_ last month at my house. I thought it would be cool to look like Rogue. It didn’t turn out as good as hers.”

“I like it,” he repeated quietly.

“Thanks,” she grinned warmly.

He nodded. “Yeah… anyway, thanks for your help, um…?”

“Rey,” she told him. “My name is Rey.”

He grinned that same wide smile that made her weirdly happy. “I’m Ben.”

“Do you want to see my sketchbook?” Rey wondered, thinking Ben looked like he could use a friend.

His face lit up, and she was immediately glad she’d offered. “Yeah,” he gushed happily. “I’d love that.”

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

He couldn’t believe this was actually happening. How many nights had he dreamt of this exact moment? Holding her like this, _touching_ her like this… he’d thought of little else since for far too long.

“We wasted so much time,” Rey sighed, her hands sneaking under the gapped fabric down his front and ghosting over his chest. Her touch was everything he’d been dreaming about and more. He couldn’t hold back the groan that escaped him, gripping at the silk of that _damned dress_ that had tormented him all night.

“I know,” he lamented. “I _know._ Not anymore. I’m yours, Rey. I’ve been yours since the day you said you liked my ears.”

She beamed up at him, her eyes shining and he dipped to kiss her again. He could kiss her until time stopped if she’d let him. His fingers wound into the soft waves of her hair, angling her face to press deeper against her lips. He felt the gentle press of her tongue against his, and he opened to meet it. His tongue laved over hers, savoring the way she felt, the way she _tasted._ He couldn’t get enough. He molded his body against her, wanting to leave an indentation on her skin in the shape of him as he pressed her further against his front door that he held her trapped against.

He felt her hand slide over the front of his pants, gripping him through the fabric and he almost lost it in that moment. Her fingers traced his growing length through his slacks, and he let his lips break from her mouth to fall instead to her neck, leaving hot kisses down her throat. This was happening. This was actually _happening._

He’d never been so grateful for a dress.

* * *

_September 9th 2010_

“It’s going to be fine, Rey,” he assured her. “I don’t care what your house looks like.”

Still she looked nervous, her lip trapped between her teeth as she twirled an unruly curl around her finger anxiously. She always did that when she was nervous, and he quickly plucked her hand away to stop her.

“It’s really small, Ben,” she remarked quietly. “Nothing like your place.”

He frowned. In the two years they’d been friends, she’d never once let him come over. She’d been to his house loads of times; to play video games, to work on their homework… you name it. His parents probably liked Rey more than they did him at this point. In all that time he’d begged her to let him see where she lived, feeling almost like he couldn’t _really_ be her best friend without gaining that final piece of her.

“Rey, I don’t care if it’s a refrigerator box. It’ll be cool because you live there,” he urged.

She smiled at him then, that wide, bright smile that did funny things to his chest. He really liked it when she smiled. His thirteen year old brain couldn’t really comprehend why, only that he needed to keep _making_ her smile. He was always trying to think of ways to make her do it. She took his hand, finally pushing open the front door of the tiny house that rested on the quiet street. The entryway was cramped, littered with shoes of various sizes from what he assumed were the other foster kids that lived with her.

She pulled him upstairs passed a cluttered kitchen, ignoring the older boy who whistled at them as they made a beeline for what he assumed was her room. She stopped just outside a door, giving him one last wary expression.

“It’s fine, Rey,” he reminded. “I promise.”

She pushed open the door to reveal what could hardly be described as any bigger than a closet, composed of nothing but a tiny bed and an even tinier dresser. Still, pieces of her lay scattered through the minuscule space, and he smiled when he noticed how she’d still made the room her own. Her sketches were taped all over the walls, a stack of books about old buildings resting on the dresser in a neat pile and beside them a picture of the two of them in a frame she’d made herself.

He picked it up, grinning at her even as she blushed. “I really like that picture,” she admitted.

“Me too,” he agreed.

She shuffled her feet, her hair already wrapped around her finger again. “So this is my room.”

He sat on her bed, grinning assuredly. “I think it’s great.”

She sat beside him in a huff. “You’re just being nice.”

“I told you,” he pressed. “It’s cool because you live here.”

She smiled again, and he felt that same weird pull in his chest. He liked it, but it scared him a little bit. She let out a sigh, shaking her head. “I hate it here.”

“Why?” he wondered.

“My friend… the only other one I had besides you, she moved to another home last month,” Rey mourned.

He glanced at her bedpost, seeing Rey’s name carved beside the friend she often spoke of. “Rose?”

Rey nodded. “I just miss her. I feel so alone here.”

“It’s okay to feel sad, Rey,” he urged gently. “Everyone feels alone sometimes.”

“Even you?” she asked curiously.

He nodded, thinking of his father at home and how he never seemed to understand him. “Especially me.”

That seemed to comfort her a bit, and she covered his hand with hers sweetly. That pull in his chest grew tighter, and he cleared his throat to stifle the odd sensation. Gesturing to the names at the bedpost, he added, “Plus, she left a little piece of herself with you.”

Rey glanced to the carvings, grinning. “I guess you’re right.”

Ben furrowed his brow, getting an idea and searching around the room for what he needed. He found the little pocket knife he’d given her for her birthday last month on her dresser, still thinking it had been an odd request for a twelve year old girl. He rose to his knees as he opened the blade, working diligently to finish his task and beaming at his work when he’d finished.

He moved to let her see his name now added into her bedpost beside hers and Rose’s, her eyes lighting up at the sight. “There,” he declared. “Now I’m there too.”

He reached for her hand again, giving it a comforting squeeze. “You’re not alone.”

She wiped at her eye, collecting the tears that threatened to fall and nodding happily. “Neither are you.”

He knew she was right. He never felt alone when she was around. He hoped he never did.

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

His hand trailed up the length of her thigh, and she shuddered at the hot press of his fingers against her skin.

“ _Ben,”_ she gasped.

“Is this okay?” he wondered.

She nodded frantically. “Yes, touch me. _Please.”_

The sapphire silk bunched at her thighs, his wandering hand pressing the fabric ever further as he sought to touch her more intimately. When his fingers met the lace of her underwear, the cloth already wet with her arousal and so thin it was as if he were touching her directly, she hissed out a breath. She felt the rough pads of his fingers trace through her drenched folds against the lace, a soft groan escaping him.

“You’re so _wet,”_ he rasped.

“For you,” she breathed. “Only for you.”

It was true. How many nights had she let her hands linger between her thighs, touching herself as he was now and wishing it were him? Nothing could have prepared for the real thing, his hand working some sort of magic between her legs. She felt him pull aside the lace scrap of her panties, teasing at her entrance with a finger before pressing the thick digit deep inside to grind against her.

Her mouth fell open in a silent gasp, her eyes fluttering as she gripped at his shoulder to steady herself. He moved to add a second finger, pumping them into her as his eyes never left her face. He watched her every expression, fixed on them as if trying to commit them to memory. She wound her fingers into his hair, pulling him close to kiss him hungrily and capturing the deep sigh that left his mouth with her own.

His forehead rested against hers when he broke away, his breaths ragged and labored as his fingers still thrust into her slowly. She whimpered softly, tightening the grip she held on his hair.

“More,” she pleaded. “I need _more.”_

* * *

_December 10th 2013_

The music pounded away inside the doors, and Ben looked nervous at even the idea of going inside. Rey laughed, tugging on his arm and pressing through the door to the gymnasium. “Come on you scaredy cat,” she teased. “It’s just a dance.”

The Winter Formal was the first real dance she’d ever been to in her fifteen years, and even though a couple of boys had asked her to go, it hadn’t felt right to go with someone other than Ben. Ben had never actually _asked_ her to go with him, it had just been some sort of assumed, unspoken thing that had led to him picking her up in his mother’s Prius. He’d even bought her a corsage, an action that had delighted her even in its cheesiness.

He’d worn a tie to match her dress, the deep blue silk complimenting his pale skin in a way her dress did nothing for her own tanned visage. Still, it had been the only one she could afford with her earnings of her afterschool job, and she was proud of it.

Ben followed after her begrudgingly, stepping into the dimly lit gymnasium as Rihanna’s _We Found Love_ pounded away overhead. She took in the sight of the other girl’s more glamorous dresses, tugging self consciously at the sleeve of her own. Ben grabbed at her hand, pulling her closer.

“Stop it,” he urged. “You look great. This color is amazing on you.”

“You think so?” She grinned shyly.

He nodded, and he pulled her closer into his side. “I think it’s my favorite color now.”

He was being nice, she knew that, but it calmed her all the same. When Ben smiled at her like that, she couldn’t help but be happy. More accurately, just being around him made her happy. Not to mention the odd sensation she felt in her stomach when she looked at him too long. Somehow in the last year he’d went from tall and awkward looking to tall and… well… not awkward. That’s for sure.

His dark hair curled at his nape, covering the ears he was still so self conscious about and looking too perfect for a boy. His wide mouth had gone from too big for his face to simply… inviting and pink and she found herself staring at it more than she liked. Not to mention the beauty marks. She couldn’t even count how many times she’d zoned out while counting them.

Ben Solo was her best friend. He had been since she was nine years old. Only… did she want that? Did she want him like a best friend? She didn’t know anymore if she did.

Rihanna still crooned about finding love in a hopeless place, and Ben gave her the most confident look she’d ever seen him give.

“Dance with me?” he asked against her ear.

She nodded slow, smiling softly as he pulled her out onto the dance floor. He danced almost as badly as she did, and still she loved every second. She laughed at his ridiculous antics, knowing he was trying to make her feel better.

It worked.

When the song changed, morphing into a slower tune, the pair of them stood awkwardly for a moment as Ellie Goulding began to sing _Love_ _Me_ _Like You Do._ Ben offered his hand finally, giving her an encouraging grin and mouthing the words, “Join me?”

She nodded, placing her hand in his and allowing him to pull her close. Her heart pounded a heavy tattoo against her ribs, its rhythm so loud she was almost afraid he would hear it over the music. She let her cheek rest against his shoulder, swaying softly even as she almost imagined a soft press of lips at her hair.

When the song waned, Ben stopped moving, pulling away to stare down at her. She looked up at him expectantly, suddenly wondering if maybe he’d been watching her… in the same way she’d been watching him. Was it possible she was not alone in this?

He opened his mouth, so ready to say something and she found herself leaning in anticipation. Only he never did. The music changed, some loud song that destroyed the mood and he jerked suddenly as a hand tugged at his elbow. They glanced beside them to find Kaydel beaming up at Ben, her fingers wrapped around his arm still in a way that made Rey seethe silently.

“Mind if I cut in?” she asked before turning to Rey. “You don’t mind if I borrow your buddy here, do you?”

Ben looked to Rey as if for guidance, and she felt at a loss. She wanted to tell Kaydel no, to get lost, to _never_ touch Ben again. Only… what if he _didn’t_ feel the same? What if she _was_ alone in this? She didn’t want to jeopardize the only thing good in her life. Didn’t want to risk losing him by weirding him out with her strange new feelings.

She forced a smile, shaking her head politely and stepping away. “Not at all.”

Kaydel grinned, pulling Ben away and into the crowd to join her. He watched Rey as he was led off, and Rey made sure to keep her expression cheerful until he disappeared into the crowd of bodies that littered the dance floor.

She didn’t understand the pain in her chest, a tight emptiness that felt terrifying in its newness. She told herself it was for the best, and that if she knew what was good for her she would squash these strange feelings quickly. Ben was her best friend. That’s what he had always been… and she couldn’t lose him.

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

“ _I need more.”_

He swallowed around the lump in his throat, her words caressing his skin as if alive and he felt his cock stiffen impossibly further at the very thought of _more._ He was still in disbelief he was even touching her like this. Her tight heat around his fingers was mind blowing, and he couldn’t help but wonder what it would feel like to sink inside her.

He was determined to find out.

He slipped his hand from underwear, lifting her to hold her against him as her legs wrapped around his waist. He held her close as he walked them both through his living room, moving down the hall beyond towards his bedroom. All the while her lips were everywhere they could reach; his mouth, his jaw, the length of his throat… he would surely go insane if she continued, and yet he never wanted her to stop.

He slowly lowered her to his bed, sitting her at the edge as he stood looking down at her. His hands move to cup her jaw, his thumb brushing against her cheek as she gazed up at him sweetly. It felt like everything in his life has been building up to this singular moment, and he needed it to be perfect. She _deserved_ perfect.

She reached for the buckle at his belt, deftly working it apart and reaching for the button after. She glanced up at him once more, seeming to ask for permission and he nodded slowly. No more holding back.

Not this time. 

* * *

_May 23rd 2015_

“Have you seen Rey?” Ben directed towards Poe, scanning the crowd of people that were spread out across his living room.

Poe looked up from his game of beer pong, shrugging his shoulders. “Haven’t seen her since we were all singing karaoke earlier. I think she went upstairs.”

Ben frowned, stumbling out of the kitchen and rubbing his fingers against his pounding head. He’d definitely had too much to drink. He worried that he’d lost Rey earlier, knowing she couldn’t handle too much alcohol and afraid he’d find her passed out in the bathtub again. They’d snuck into his parent’s liquor cabinet too many times during their senior year for him to count.

He still couldn’t believe they’d graduated, and that after the summer they’d be off for college. Of course they’d made plans to go to the same campus, and the thought was both comforting and terrifying. What if she met some slick college boy that swept her off her feet? He needed to just be honest. He needed to tell her that he didn’t want to be her friend. That he’d wanted more for a long time now.

He struggled to climb the stairs in his inebriated state, wondering if this was the perfect time to just let it all out. If things went wrong, he could just blame it on the alcohol. In his current state the plan seemed genius.

He quickly scanned the upstairs bedroom, finding no sign of Rey and laughing softly to himself when he realized exactly where he’d find her. He pushed open the door to his own room, crossing the space and entering his bathroom to flick on the overhead light. She peeked up at him happily from her seat in his bathtub, her head resting against the tub edge and a glass of wine clutched firmly in her hand.

“Hey there, Ben,” she slurred. “Fancy meeting you here.”

God she was beautiful. Even like this, her hair a mess, her eyeliner smudged to high hell… she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.  She tipped back her glass for another sip, humming as the liquid hit her tongue. She coughed slightly, jerking forward as some of the wine sloshed over the glass to spill in the bathtub, and she clicked her tongue in regret.

“Whoops,” she giggled.

He fell to the floor beside the tub, letting his chin rest against the edge as his arms draped over the inside to take the glass from her. “I think you’ve had enough.”

“Speak for yourself,” she huffed. “I saw you killing it at beer pong before I came upstairs.”

Ben chuckled softly. “Yeah, going to have a hell of a time cleaning the house before my parents get back Monday.”

She yawned, stretching her arms above her head. “Worth it.”

He took in the sight of her relaxed state, her soft waves tumbling over her shoulder and her cheek resting against the edge of the tub as her eyes fluttered closed. He found he couldn’t agree more. Spending time with her like this was worth any price.

“Yeah,” he agreed quietly. “I think so too.”

She smiled even as her eyes remained closed, her face so dangerously close to his and for a moment he was left wondering what her skin might feel like against his lips. Watching the soft rise and fall of her chest, her eyes still shut tight, he found he was just drunk enough to find out.

He leaned, letting his lips rest gently against her forehead and linger as he closed his eyes. He pressed a little harder, wishing somehow that he could mark her with his kiss, _claim_ her somehow. If only it were that easy.

When he pulled away, he found her eyes wide open and fixed on him. Her mouth was parted slightly in shock, and he could only stare back breathlessly as he wondered if he’d went to far. They had never been the type to withhold touch, their friendship filled with hand holding and hugs and errant cuddling that drove Ben slightly insane.

Only this… this felt different somehow. This felt… _more._

She said nothing, simply continuing to stare at him with glassy eyes and he became nervous that he’d made a mistake. His feelings weren’t worth losing the only thing good in his life. The only person who made him feel like he was more than he was. If she didn’t feel the same… it would ruin them.

“Sorry,” he muttered, rising from the floor quickly and his hands shaking from holding back from her. “I think I’m a little too drunk. That was weird.”

Still she stared back at him, her expression confused, almost pained, and he knew he had to get out of that bathroom before he fucked things up further.

She called after him, her voice strained. “Ben, I—”

“Hey don’t mind me,” he interrupted. “I’m just being silly. You should come back down to the party. People were looking for you.”

She looked… sad. Why did she look sad? He didn’t want to stay and find out. He quickly closed the bathroom door behind him, his chest so tight he feared it might burst. He forced himself to walk away… knowing he wanted to do anything but.

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

She couldn’t get his pants off fast enough. She knew this was a line they were crossing, a line they could never come back from and a small part of her was terrified. She quickly stamped down her fear, telling herself that nothing but good would come from this. This was _Ben._ Everything was happening just as it always should have.

She could see the outline of him through the dark grey briefs he wore underneath, and she felt her mouth go dry at the sight. She’d seen Ben in his underwear before, just as he had hers; the hazards of having a friend of the opposite sex for so long. But like this? His cock hard and straining against the tight fabric of his briefs?

Nothing could have prepared her for it.

She let her palm cover him, squeezing his length slightly as his fingers thread into her hair. She slid her hand upwards, her finger hooking into the band of his underwear and her eyes locked on his as she pulled it down to free him. His cock jut out between them, velvet skin wrapped around steel and she pushed at his briefs with more vigor as he wriggled out of them to kick them away.

She wrapped her hands around his cock, working his length experimentally as she followed the cues he gave with his sharp breaths and soft groans. His fingers tightened in her waves, a shudder passing through him as he thrust forward instinctively. The thick head of his cock rested only a breath away from her mouth, and she was wrought with the overwhelming urge to taste him.

Following her urges and glancing upward to meet his heated gaze, she leaned to do just that.

* * *

_August 2nd 2017_

Something felt off. Something had felt off the entire _night._ Her date had been funny, charming, polite… she’d had _fun._ So why was she so ready to be home? Every second spend with this other man felt like a betrayal.

That was ridiculous, she knew that. Ben had never given her any indication that he wanted more with her. That he wanted to be more than friends. Even still, his voice was the only one she wanted to hear.

Her date walked her to the door, and she could tell by his actions he had every intention of kissing her goodnight. Maybe even to press for more. He was so handsome... she should have been excited. He was everything a girl could want. There was just one problem.

He wasn’t Ben.

She told her date goodnight, trying not to feel too guilty by his disappointed expression and instead quickly escaping into the dorm room building. She hated these dorms, hated the loud college boys and the icy girls that lived on her floor. In their eyes she was nothing more than a scholarship nobody that spent too much time in the library.

Ben had told her more than once that she should just take the spare bedroom in his apartment, assuring her his parents wouldn’t care in the slightest if she did so. They’d rented his place after his first year at school, and he’d argued that she spent more time there than at her dorm anyway.

He had a point, she knew that, but she didn’t trust herself to be so close to him. Being in his space, with nowhere to escape to… she didn’t think she could survive it. She was barely making it as it was. Being around him had gotten to a point of pain, making it almost hard to breathe when he was near.

That is what had led her to the farce of a date in the first place, hoping that by attempting to be with someone else it might help ease her out of the hopelessness that was her feelings for her best friend. After tonight though… there was no denying the hard truth.

She was hopelessly, and irrevocably in love with Ben Solo. There could be no one else.

She pushed into her dorm dolefully, stepping out of her shoes and flinging herself on her bed. She let out a deep sigh, wishing things were different but now knowing how to make it so. Her phone sounded then, and she reached for it blindly, pulling it from her pocket and frowning. Of course he would call. Why wouldn’t he call today?

She put the receiver to her ear, closing her eyes and steeling herself for the longing that was sure to follow. “Hey.”

“Hey…” he started cautiously. “Still mad at me?”

She huffed out a breath. “I wasn’t the one that was angry.”

“I wasn’t _angry,”_ he argued. “I just… we always spend our birthdays together. I guess when that guy asked you out… I guess I was just being a baby about it.”

She recalled the argument they’d had earlier in the week, a spat that had turned ugly when both of them had let their emotions get the best of them. She couldn’t make Ben understand why she’d wanted to go out with someone else on her birthday… not without explaining just how much she cared about him. Words had been exchanged that they hadn’t meant, and she’d missed his voice more than words could say in the days that followed leading up to that one.

“It’s okay, Ben,” she assured him. “We both said things we didn’t mean. Let’s just forget it ever happened.”

“How was your birthday dinner?” he wondered cautiously.

“It was… okay,” she sighed.

“Did you… like him?” He pressed quietly.

“He was nice,” she said with more resolve. “Handsome too.”

“Oh,” he replied evenly, his voice giving nothing away. “That’s… that’s great, Rey. Do you think you’ll see him again?”

“I had such a good time, and he was so much fun. I should _want_ to see him again,” she insisted.

“But?” Ben pressed.

“But what?” she groused.

“I sense a but here,” he persisted. “So, what’s the but?”

_He’s not you._

“I don’t know,” Rey said instead. “Just didn’t feel right.”

He hummed in agreement, letting the silence stretch between them for a moment before continuing. “It felt weird not taking you out on your birthday. We always celebrate together.”

“I know,” she agreed. “We should have just went like usual.”

“Well… there’s always _my_ birthday.” He reminded gently.

She nodded to herself, choking back the emotion that threatened to overtake her. She knew his birthday would most likely end the same way, that nothing would ever change between them because she was too afraid to make that leap.

“Yeah,” she sighed. “There’s always _your_ birthday.”

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

_Fuck._ Her lips around his cock were nothing short of nirvana, her tongue pressing to the underside exploringly as she bobbed down his length slowly. He focused on not pulling at her hair too hard, unable to tear his eyes away from the sight of her pink lips sliding over his aching cock again and again. If it hadn’t felt so fucking incredible, he could have come from the image alone.

She took him in her mouth shallowly, her hands working the base of him as the head of his cock rubbed at the inside of her cheek. When she tried to take more of him, pressing down to let him push further into her throat, she gagged softly and pulled away to gasp for air. She looked embarrassed, frowning as she leaned in to make another attempt and he tipped her chin upwards to halt her.

“I’m sorry, I… I’ve never done this before,” she whispered shyly.

Oh _God,_ she was going to ruin him. He tilted her face upwards, leaning to kiss her softly. “Neither have I.”

“I can try again…” she offered.

He shook his head. “I want to come inside you the first time.”

She let out a shaky breath, nodding softly and moving with him as he pushed her backwards to lie across the bed. Again he let his hands slide down the length of blue silk wrapped around her body, still in awe that she’d remembered after all this time.

“That’s really why you wore this dress?” he marveled.

She smiled softly, pulling him downwards to let his weight settle over her. He felt her fingers in his hair, her lips at his ear and the warmth of her breath brushing against him softly as he stifled a shudder.

“Ben _...”_ she simpered. “I only bought this dress so you could take it _off_.”

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

_Earlier_

“This is a lovely party, Ben,” his mother approved. “It was such a good idea to invite everyone over to your place. Are you having a good birthday?”

He barely registered what she’d asked, his eyes still surreptitiously scanning the room to try and catch another glimpse of her in that _damned dress_. It should be illegal to wear a dress like that.

“I’m sorry,” he offered distractedly. “What did you say?”

Leia tutted. “You’re so off kilter tonight. What’s the matter?”

“Nothing,” he muttered. “Just a little distracted.”

Leia smiled as she tipped back her wine glass, taking a long sip and giving him a suspicious glance. “Ah, I wonder why?”

She gave a small nod across the room, and Ben followed her gaze to find the source of his distraction in a corner, having a casual chat with his father. He frowned, wondering if Han had roped her into yet another discussion about why Ben’s future plans were somehow lesser than his glorified views of a military career.

Leia noticed his discontent, laying a comforting hand on his forearm. “Hey, he’s gotten a lot better.”

Ben rolled his eyes. “He’s still not okay with me wanting to go into journalism.”

Leia shrugged. “I doubt he ever will be… but he doesn’t pick at you about it anymore at least.”

“Yes,” Ben grumbled. “That _is_ something I guess.”

“Rey still planning for architectural design?” Leia pressed.

Ben beamed proudly. “She is. Top of her class.”

Leia eyed his pleased expression, sighing softly. “If you don’t tell her how you feel soon… you’re going to lose her.”

Ben snapped his head towards his mother, giving her an incredulous look. “What?”

“Oh, Ben,” Leia chuckled. “Do you think your Mama is stupid? You’ve been in love with that girl since before you even knew what love was.”

He afforded another glance towards Rey, letting out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “What if she doesn’t feel the same way?”

“Twelve years _,_ Ben,” Leia urged. “She’s been with you for _twelve years._ Has she ever been involved with someone in all that time?”

Ben considered, no one of relevance coming to mind. “No, not really.”

“Beautiful girl like Rey… do you think she would have any problems snagging herself a man?” Leia pressed gently.

His eyes passed over the brightness of her eyes, the fullness of her lips, the way the silk of that god forsaken dress hugged her in a way that should have been a sin. “No,” he concluded finally. “Someone would have to be crazy not to want her.”

Leia pat his shoulder, leaving him to his thoughts with one last parted wisdom. “Maybe it would be safe to assume then that she was _waiting_ for someone. Maybe that someone is you, son.”

His mother’s words clung to him long after, thinking that maybe there could possibly be truth in them. Maybe Rey _had_ been waiting on him to make a move. She caught his eye from across the room, offering him that smile that stole his breath. She gave her attention back to his father just as quickly, leaving nothing more than the memory of a secret moment in a crowded room.

Maybe it was time he faced his fears.

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

_Present_

“I’ve wanted to tear this dress off you since the moment you walked through my door,” he breathed into her skin, his large hands gripping at the tight fabric even as she felt his cock pressed insistently at her thigh.

“Then do it,” she breathed, her fingers skirting underneath his shirt to slide over his skin.

He leaned up to look down at her, his eyes so dark they appeared almost black with need. She rolled to her front, leaving the zipper at the back of the dress on display and peeking at him over her shoulder expectedly. She felt his fingers toying with the zipper, the slow drag of the metal ghosting down her back as the silk fell apart.

She heard him blow out a breath as his fingers skirted along the smooth skin of her back, wearing no bra beneath the dress to hinder him. He leaned to press a kiss against her shoulder as he pushed the straps over her arms, quickly rolling Rey to her back once more. The fluid like fabric spilled around her shoulders, clinging to the swell of her breasts that rose and fell heavily beneath it.

He gripped at the silken hem, slowly peeling it down her body and baring her breasts to him. “You’re perfect,” he rasped.

The blue silk gathered at her waist, and he leaned as if pulled by some invisible force to wrap his lips around one of hardened buds. He rolled it beneath his tongue, pulling at it softly with his lips as she arched into his mouth.

His hand came to cup its twin, tweaking her nipple with his fingers as his tongue traced a path over the soft swell beneath her breast. She reveled in the sensation of his tongue, and she felt almost as if he’d left his mark on her, a golden tattoo that could not be seen but could be _felt._

She felt his hands tracing the length of her body, pushing at the last bit of dress that lay between them to pull it down her legs as she let it fall away. Releasing his hold on her nipple, he glanced down between them to the lacy scrap of her underwear, sliding a finger along the hem and looking back at her in question. She nodded, needing him to cast away that last piece of fabric that kept them apart. She wanted nothing between them.

Not anymore.

* * *

  _February 6th 2018_

_Earlier_

_“_ You don’t have to help me clean up,” he assured her for what had to have been the fifth time.

She waved him off. “It’s not a big deal. Did everyone leave?”

Ben nodded, his eyes trained on the sink where he was currently washing dishes. “It’s just us now.”

She sucked in a breath, her grip on the bowl she held too tight and she had to remind herself to relax. Being so close to him all night… so close and yet so far away… it had been torture. She felt foolish wearing this ridiculous dress, knowing it had been too much for something as simple as a birthday party. She didn’t know what she’d been thinking. Or rather, _she did_ , but it hadn’t gone as she’d hoped.

She sat the bowl on his counter, taking note of the way Ben seemed to tense at her closeness. Had he seen through her intentions? Had they made him uncomfortable? It felt as if he’d barely spoken to her all night.

He glanced at her, his eyes passing slowly over the blue silk that clung to her embarrassingly before returning to meet her gaze. “You look… beautiful tonight. I’m sorry I hadn’t told you before now.”

She felt herself blush, reaching to twirl a lock of hair around her finger. “Thank you… this dress is a little ridiculous.”

He cleared his throat, his eyes falling again got the sink. “That dress is… amazing on you.”

She chuckled softly, the words leaving her mouth before she could stop them. “You said it was your favorite color, so.”

He dropped the glass he’d been cleaning, turning to face her as his mouth parted in surprise. “What did you say?”

“I— I meant—” she stammered, scrambling for an explanation and finding none. She took a deep breath, steeling her resolve. “Don’t you remember? That night… my dress was the same color then.”

He nodded slowly, still seeming slightly shell shocked. “You… you wore that because of me?”

She chewed her lip, knowing she was risking everything. Knowing she could be ruining everything they had together. Still, she was tired of hiding it. Tired of pretending she wanted only to be his friend.

“What if I did?” she ventured, meeting his gaze with resolve.

He said nothing, the silence stretching between them like a chasm and with every second that passed she feared being unable to cross it more and more. She felt tears sting her eyes, clenching her fists together as her eyes fell to the ground.

“I can’t do this anymore, Ben,” she choked out. “It’s killing me.”

Still he said nothing, and she wished more than anything to be able to read his thoughts in that moment. “I know I’ve probably ruined everything, but I can’t do it anymore. I don’t want you like a best friend. I haven’t for a long time.”

She chanced a look at him, finding that same stunned expression coloring his features and offering her no hope. She felt her heart breaking in her chest and she knew then if she didn’t escape this room she would drown in the current that was her emotions. She nodded to herself, sensing the end of all things and turning to go.

“Happy birthday, Ben,” she whispered as she walked away. Every step towards the door felt like her last, each one tearing her apart.

“ _Rey.”_

She stilled, her name on his lips rooting her to the spot. That’s all it took from Ben. He need only say her name and everything just stops. She felt his arms around her before she could even register his footsteps across the floor, turning her to pull her against his chest. He crushed her to him, burrowing his face in her hair as he clung to her.

“I don’t want you like a best friend either,” he murmured brokenly. “I want all of you. In every way I can have you. Forever.”

She felt a choked sob escape her, a sense of relief flooding through her and breathing new life. She clutched at his shirt, leaning to look at him and seeing nothing but the love she felt reflected in his eyes. How had she never noticed it before?

“I was so terrified to lose you. So afraid you didn’t feel the same way,” she cried.

He smoothed the loose curls away from her face, cupping her cheeks and offering her that same toothy grin that she was certain she’d first fell in love with. “Don’t be afraid, Rey,” he whispered reverently. “I feel it too.”

She felt her heart racing in her chest, watching as he leaned to do the very thing she’d been dreaming of for years. With only a duck of his head, his lips feathersoft against hers just as she’d knew they would be… she kissed her best friend.

* * *

_February 6th 2018_

_Present_

He was terrified he was dreaming. Surely he would wake up any moment and find himself alone in this very bed, having imagined every blessed moment of the last half hour. She was perfect, in every way he’d known she would be. Everything he’d ever wanted was written into her skin; every curve, every bend, every soft dip of tanned flesh seeming as if made only for him and he knew he could spend hours learning every part of it. He wanted to map every inch of her skin with his tongue, to know every piece of her in a way no one ever had before.

She pushed at his shirt impatiently, urging him to take it off and he quickly obliged to toss it away. Naked, nothing left between them but their own skin, he let a hand curl possessively around her hip.

“You’ve no idea how long I’ve thought about this,” he murmured.

She grinned, her fingers trailing over his abdomen. “I have a good idea.”

His fingers trailed over her skin, sliding over her hip to press against the soft curls at the junction of her thighs. He met her gaze as he dipped a finger between her folds, her mouth parting slightly as he dragged it upwards to press at her clit. She gasped softly as he added another finger, pressing into the taut bud and studying her reactions to learn what she liked best. He found a steady rhythm, her soft nods and muted cries prompting him further and he increased his pace as she came apart.

She rolled her hips into his hand, seeking more of his touch as her voice breathily begged for more. He felt the moment she fell over the edge, her body tightening and her back arching even as her thighs shook. Still he circled the swollen bud, amazed at the way every swipe seemed to draw sharp waves of pleasure from her. Amazed that _he’d_ made her feel that way.

Her fingers curled around his neck, pulling her down to him and kissing him fiercely. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he groaned as the action caused his still rigid cock to slide against her slick core.

“I want—” he grit out, his head falling forward as he instinctually rut against her. “I want to be the only one who touches you like this.”

“ _Ben_ ,” she breathed, “you're the only one who ever has.”

His mouth parted in surprised, the implications of her words settling in his mind. “You mean…?”

She nodded. “It never felt right. It does now.”

He couldn’t help it, he laughed at the serendipitous turn of events. “I guess it never felt right for me either.”

Her eyes widened. “Never?”

“It’s only you, Rey,” he breathed, shaking his head. “It’s only ever been you.”

She beamed, her face like sunshine even as her eyes threatened to spill with what he assumed were happy tears. “I want this, Ben,” she pleaded. “I want you.”

“So do I,” he assured, pulling her closer as his lips brushed against hers. “It’s all I’ve _ever_ wanted.”

* * *

  _February 6th 2018_

_Present_

She might actually go insane if she felt his cock slide against her again, a maddening heat burning deep inside her and begging to be sated. She’d been reduced to nothing more than a mewling pile of sensation and still she needed _more_.

“Ben, _please,”_ she whimpered.

“Shh,” he soothed, his hand gripping at her hip. “Please tell me you’re still on birth control.”

She couldn’t help but grin despite the heated moment, nodding in confirmation. “It’s weird that you know that.”

He chuckled softly, shrugging a shoulder. “I know everything about you.”

His palm smoothed over the swell of her hip, sliding down the length of her thigh to pull her legs further apart as he dipped to press at her entrance.

“Everything but _this,”_ he continued, “but now that’s mine too.”

She felt him nudge inside, just the head of him enough to stretch her and she closed her eyes to focus on the way his thick length filled her slowly. He met resistance, as they knew he would, and he ducked his head to leave a searing kiss at her lips as he pushed through.

She felt nothing more than a sharp pinch, the initial sting giving way to a warm fullness that she could almost feel in every facet of her body. Ben lay still, so impossibly still as he held himself in check. In only moments every trace of discomfort had ebbed away, and the only thing left was her ever pressing need for _more_.

“I’m okay,” she assured him, her fingers carding through the loose tendrils at his nape. “You can move now.”

He moaned low as his lips found her throat, his hips arcing outwards and his cock dragging against her slick channel before he pressed back inside. He repeated the motion, sliding back into her as her fingers moved to claw at his shoulders.

Every thrust of his hips came faster and faster, his body sliding against hers with the aid of the thin sheen of sweat that clung to their skin. She felt the familiar pressure building deep inside, Ben’s breath at her ear only heating her further as she canted her pelvis to meet his every thrust.

“I’m so close,” she moaned. “ _So close.”_

 _”Come,”_ he urged. “Come with me. I need to feel you come.”

He grasped at her thighs with each hand, rising to his knees to pound into her and letting instinct take over. His wide palm flattened over her abdomen, applying a pressure that only made everything that much more intense. Her thighs shook, spasms rocking through her as she fell into a consuming orgasm that left her mind a haze of dizzying pleasure. She cried out as she came, his hands falling on either side of her to cage her in as he pushed erratically into to her quivering warmth.

His thrusts grew messy, his abdomen clenching with impending release and in only seconds he was following after her. Warmth bloomed inside her as he filled her with thick bursts of his spend, falling to cover her body with his own as he clung tightly to her. Every twitch of movement inside her caused her to shudder in response, and it was several moments before either of them recovered.

His lips were everywhere they could reach then, peppering kisses over her face, her jaw, her throat… leaving a trail of adoration wherever he could.

“I love you,” he rasped into her skin. “I’ve always loved you.”

She choked back a sob, clinging to him in hopes to never let go. “I love you too,” she cried, “I love you so much, Ben.”

“You’re my one and only. You always have been,” he murmured, his lips pressing to her cheek in reverence.

“I feel the same. You’re like… my lifeline. Always have been,” she whispered.

He pulled out of her with a groan, pulling her against him and stroking her hair. She settled into his warmth, still in awe that things had ended this way. No, she thought, not ended.

Things were only just beginning. 

* * *

_February 7th 2018_

_Morning_

Sunlight poured in through the curtains, catching his face in its rays and he stretched lightly from beneath the covers they’d settled under last night. They’d fallen asleep well into the night, exhausted from talking about anything and everything. It was odd, he’d thought he’d known all there was to know about Rey, and yet there’d been an entire side to her he’d never seen. He supposed the same could be said for him. Now that everything had been made known, he felt more complete than he ever had.

He reached for her, finding her spot on the bed empty and for a moment he felt a mild tremor of panic. It was staunched quickly by the sounds of her padding down the hallway, appearing in his doorway moments later. She was dressed in nothing but his button down from the night before, and he felt a stirring between his legs only from the sight of her.

She carried a plate in her hand, crossing the floor to sit on the bed and offering it to him. His mouth watered for the breakfast she’d made, grinning as he leaned to kiss her cheek. “I woke up just in time.”

“Mm,” she hummed contently. “ _I_ woke up by your side. It was… fantastic.”

“You’re welcome to do it for the rest of your life if you want,” he offered with promise.

“You know,” she grinned, leaning close to let her mouth hover over his. “I thought you’d never ask.”

He’d never know how he got so lucky, or why the universe had gifted him with Rey all those years ago, but he would spend an eternity giving thanks. She was everything he’d ever wanted, and everything he’d ever need. Even in his worst light, she saw the truth in him. Finally they’d made that leap, crossing over from friendship into something more and he would cherish it and her for the rest of his life.

…and he owed it all to a dress.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Come say hi on [tumblr](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/kylotrashforever)!  
> I made a [Twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/KTF_Reylo), come follow me!


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